How to choose good children's books

My two cents on how to find books that delight both you and your children.

I don’t know if you’ve ever brought a two- and four-year-old child to the library with you (at the same time) and thought you would browse the stacks together looking for the perfect pile of books to bring home, but if you have—like me—you will be sorely disappointed.

Two year olds and four year olds do not go to the library to choose books. They go to push buttons on the water fountains, play with the train table, test out the comfy chairs and climb on every stool.

The first time the three of us went to the library, I frantically scanned the stacks while chasing down my children, hoping I’d find something to bring home with us. I quickly realized that I wouldn’t be able to leisurely browse the bookshelves the way I imagined—at least not for a few more years.

So if you, like me, find yourself scouring the internet for books to put on hold at the library, I thought I’d share the criteria I use to find good children’s books. And I mean books that are good—enjoyable to read, beautiful to look at and inspiring for children.

While every family’s reading goals and priorities are different, here are the four criteria I typically follow. I hope they’re helpful for you, too!

The books must be interesting to my children—and me.

This might be obvious, but choose books on topics that your children—and you—will enjoy. (After all, you will be the one reading these books hundreds of times, so set yourself up for success!) Just because a book is on a bestseller list doesn’t mean you and your family will like it. In fact, I usually don’t find many books I like on new bestseller lists.

As we introduce our babies and toddlers to reading, we want them to develop a lifelong love of reading. Notice their interests, and cater to them. Then consider your interests, and cater to those, too! (An example of me doing so is here.)

Contemplate the themes you all like (construction vehicles, ballerinas, bears, etc.) illustrators who inspire you and formats you enjoy (interactive books, lift-the-flap, search and find, etc.).

“I am almost inclined to set it up as a canon that a children’s story which is enjoyed only by children is a bad children’s story. The good ones last.”

— C. S. Lewis

The books should respect children and their experiences.

I sometimes wonder if adults forget that children, while they are small, are still people with their own experiences and opinions. Babies and toddlers don’t need high-action stories to capture and keep their attention, and rhyme and repetition bring them a sense of security. They are just beginning to discover the world and every little thing that happens in it. In fact, some of the books my children are most enchanted by are those that have very little action, are slow paced, and meet them where they are.

For example, in “Bunny’s Noisy Book” by Margaret Wise Brown, a little bunny takes note of everything he hears—and doesn’t hear—during a typical day. The most action-packed part of the story is when the little bunny sneezes, but then he stops to consider: “And what kind of noise was that?” The way the bunny analyzes routine occurrences mimics how my children approach their own days, which makes them feel seen and validated.

“I don’t think I’m essentially interested in children’s books. I’m interested in writing, and in pictures. I’m interested in people and in children because they are people.”

—Margaret Wise Brown

The books should instill the values that you want you child to have.

It probably goes without saying that parents should provide their children with good role models. However, I’ve noticed that some books, in trying to show children what good behavior looks like, they will first show a bad behavior and then swoop in with positive behavior to correct it. That type of modeling can be fine, but I’ve noticed that my children will often become fascinated by the bad behaviors and forget all about the “boring” good ones.

So, for the stage of life my family is currently in, I try to find books that only model good behaviors.

“Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. Otherwise you are making their destiny not brighter but darker.”

— C.S. Lewis

Books that are not preachy.

Before I go any further, I will acknowledge that didactic books can be helpful—especially to the toddler set (i.e. books that explain that hands are not for hitting, or what to do when you’re angry). As parents, grandparents and caregivers, we sometimes need some support in teaching children certain concepts.

But didactic books are boring and, frankly, insulting to both adults’ and children’s intelligence. Human beings—even the littlest ones—learn best through stories. According to pscyhologist Jerome Bruner, we are 22 times more likely to remember information when it is told through a story.

Allow your child the freedom to come to their own conclusions as you reach the end of a story. The message will have a significantly more profound impact on them when they can discover the story’s moral on their own rather than it being forced upon them.

“For a good story usually has some pleasure for any age, and certainly the adult’s own enjoyment of the story creeps into his reading of it and gives a definite heightening and flavor. And why should not a child’s story submit to the same standards of good honest writing as any real literature?

— Margaret Wise Brown

There are, of course, many other factors that make for wonderful children’s books, but these are some that help guide me. I’d love to hear how you go about choosing books for your family! Are there any authors that you always reach for when you see them on the shelves? Please share in the comments!

And if this topic resonates with you, please share this newsletter with someone else who might enjoy it, too.